“I’d like the seller to pay my half of my closing costs. Isn’t it normal to share the costs?”
Yes and no. It depends on what you mean by “share the costs.”
When a home sells, the buyer and seller have different costs that they pay. There’s no law that says who pays what. Rather, it’s based on common practice in that geographical area.
In San Diego, the seller typically pays the real estate fee, the “owner’s policy” of title insurance, half of the main escrow fee, the county transfer tax, and other fees.
The buyer typically pays the “lender’s policy” of title insurance (unless they pay cash, in which case there is not such a fee), half of the main escrow fee, the fees for getting a loan, their inspection fees, and other fees.
So you could say in this scenario they’re “sharing the costs.”
But I think you’re wanting the seller to share what is typically your costs as the buyer. It’s not normal or expected that the seller pays half of your costs, but you could ask.
In a hot seller’s market, most sellers will decline. In a balanced market, some sellers will and some won’t. In a buyer’s market, you’re more likely to get the seller to agree.